He asked me to be his again today. Of course I said yes. Then I realized what day it was. May 17th, 2012. Two years ago on this day, we started dating for the first time. We’ve been on and off, and it’s been so hard. But I never gave up on us. I love you. <3
I’ve been fighting for this relationship for two years now. I’ll be damned if I give up now. I may not have any support from my friends or my family, but I don’t care. I love this boy with every gram of my soul. Past all the lies, the hurt, the tears, I’m still in love. I’m not letting everything I’ve spent my time and effort on walk out the door. I wish people could be happy that I’m happy, but that’s obviously too much to ask. I don’t need anyone who doesn’t want me to be happy. People I really need in my life are those who are happy for me, even if it’s against every thing they believe in.
I’m giving up a nice, honest, sweet, perfect guy. For you. I’m hoping you’ll seriously change this time. I don’t feel this way for anyone else, that’s why I can’t be with anyone else. Don’t show me that I can’t believe you. I want you to fight for me and fight for us.
I guess I don’t care about you anymore as much as I thought I did. Usually when we break up, I cry for days. I haven’t shed one tear. I haven’t even came close. I think I’ve finally stopped letting you get to me, because I know how you are. And I know you will never change. I think I’m done here, I’m not trying it again. I’m gonna find somebody who isn’t lying when they tell me they love me.
I love you, don’t get me wrong. But every time I think things are getting better between, I’m instantly proved wrong. I thought things were finally going good again, and now I see they’re not. I’m the type of person who needs constant attention, I need to know you want me. And the past couple days, I haven’t felt like you need me at all. No texts, no calls, barely any touching. And I know your ex is in town. Of course my mind is gonna jump to a bad place when you won’t reply to my texts message and I know she’s around. She’s taken you from me before. What’s the difference now? I had to put my heart back together to give it to you. And now I’m starting to regret it. I’ve got to learn to quit doing this, because I’m sick of feeling this constant pain. Two years of this is enough..
